JUNO COUNSELING AND WELLNESS

You Deserve to Feel Happy

You Deserve to Feel Happy

By: Vanessa Gonzalez

 

Most people spend their lives pursuing happiness and making it their life’s goal to live happily ever after. However, some people feel they don’t deserve a happy ending, and some give up the pursuit altogether. Happiness can be described in many ways, and it’s one of the primary emotions we feel like a child. We aren’t taught to feel happiness. We just do. Other emotions similar to joy are gratitude, joy, pride, zest, optimism, and many more.

 

For many, happy times and moments seem far and few between, causing the belief that we are not worthy of those times and sabotaging any attempt to be happy. As a result, they never ask that special person out, pursue that dream career, or say yes to a night with friends.

 

So, why are we stopping ourselves from finding the one thing we all seem to be in hopes of finding?

 

Things that may be stopping you:

 

Anxiety

 

Anxiety can cause us to become immobilized and keep us from doing the things that bring us joy in our life. IT can cause people to avoid meaningful relationships or situations. Or, some anxiety might cause people to feel that if they are happy, something terrible will happen soon as a result.

 

Trauma

 

The negative aftereffects of trauma can cause someone to feel little to no control over their life. Commonly with those that experience trauma, there are often feelings of disassociation where people may disconnect from the present moment and split their emotions or shut them off completely. Unfortunately, this results in also cutting out more positive feelings like joy or excitement.

 

Survivor’s Guilt

 

The negative aftereffects of trauma can cause someone to feel little to no control over their life. Commonly with those that experience trauma, there are often feelings of disassociation where people may disconnect from the present moment and split their emotions or shut them off completely. Unfortunately, this results in also cutting out more positive feelings like joy or excitement.

 

Inner Critic

 

Many individuals have that perfectionistic inner voice constantly telling them that they will only be happy if they complete a certain amount of tasks. Or, they base their happiness on the number of things they accomplish or what they do. This leads to unrealistic expectations, resulting in the feeling you aren’t good enough and constant negative self-talk, which results in unhappiness.

 

How to Heal From the Past

 

You deserve to be liberated from your past because, quite simply, you are not your past experiences. You are not the choice you made or the opportunities you didn’t take. We are human, and happiness is one of the core biological foundations of our human experience. If we keep living in the past, the past continues to grow and have more and more control over our present. Here are some ways you can begin to accept happiness in your life.

 

  • Forgive someone who wronged you
  • Forgive yourself
  • Understand that you did the best with what you could at the time.
  • Speak kinder to yourself
  • Accept what happened
  • Live in the present moment
  • Work with a therapist to treat your anxiety or depression
  • Work with a therapist to resolve your trauma
  • Take what you learned and apply it to your future

 

If you are convinced that you are undeserving of happiness, you need to work with a profession and find a way to work towards forgiveness. You deserve to be happy because you are alive. You are breathing. You are you.

 

“There’s a difference between thinking you deserve to be happy and knowing that you are worthy of being happy. Your being alive makes worthiness your birthright. You alone are enough.” Oprah Winfrey

 

Find a qualified therapist in Jupiter, FL. A Jupiter therapist is here to help with your mental health, marriage counseling, and child therapy needs. We serve Jupiter, FL and Palm Beach Gardens, FL.

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